Why haven’t I tried

Why haven’t I tried
To persevere 
To try and do the good that I could

What would people think?
Or say?
Don’t
You might fall sick

Just keep away
Do your duty
To your family

Things will be 
Taken care of
There are so many other
Kind souls

Yes
The problems
Will be resolved
Through prayer 
God will act
Why does that leave me
With an empty heart?

That little boy I could teach
But what if
I did fall sick
What would happen
To my children
God will take care
Someone else will
Why does it leave me
With an empty heart?

I’m a misfit I’m sure
People around me
Don’t feel 
The way I do

There are some
Who live a life
Of sacrifice
Living their life
For others

When I see
The wealth
The intellect
God has provided
All I do 
Is twiddle my thumbs 
Out of fear
Of rehab

The price of
Sanity
Is very steep
Am I doing
The right Thing
Burying my talents?
My answer is no
Because
Of 
The discontent heart

The day will come
When I’ll be free
I would help 
The maids I think
They who slog
Without a break
No Saturdays off
Nor Sundays
Without them
Our life uncomfortable 
They day they take
A break
We question them
Couldn’t they send
Another
To their cousin’s funeral?
Their husbands drink
They beat
They carry on
For their children 
Bonus time
We buy them sweets
Or a saree
When all they need 
Is the money
I would like
To them empower 
Give them skills
Making Xmas  sweets?
Baby sitting?
Nursing the old?
Professional cleaning?
At a decent wage
A weekend off
Some insurance?
Aren’t they also
Covered
By minimum wage?
By inflation
They’re hardest hit
But it’s we who complain
That money’s tight
We can’t give them
Another rise

Many thoughts but
All in the mind
Can’t express
Out of fear
Of rehab

My children now
They understand 
My husband too

But why still
There
The hesitation 
The fear
Of rehab?

I try to start
Opposition
The stress 
It will make you sick
You help I say
In the work
Take my stress and make it yours
I may not be able
To do what I plan
But there may not be
Emptiness
In my heart
Till I think 
Of something else






Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The cancer within

He Travelled far for his work Slogging from six to ten Persistent Cough He never smoked He never drank One son  In his twenties Works and drinks His wages gone  His wife She a maid Or was Lost    her jobs Too many breaks For visits  To The hospital No money  No help The government hospital A hole in his throat A pipe to feed The pain  Uncontrollable Tears he sheds Cannot speak  Hands outstretched  Begging for relief His body eaten up No morphine for his pain The hospitals won’t take him He’s a hopeless case My maid    she shares A generous soul With her next door neighbour From her meagre wages She feels And his tears She hears his voice He cannot talk My little boy His stack of coins To her he gives Why don’t I? Am I afraid Of the rehab? He takes the coins Buys his release It dosent kill He lingers on His pain increases  Begs for death Every day His wife suffering
Read more

A little less than average

My child He isn’t retarded He isn’t dyslexic He isn’t a slow learner He has no ADHD No labels For him He is good at math When I teach him But in his exams  he makes mistakes He’s spelling are  Not bad When he spells them For me But when written Many of them Incorrect He does mix His B’s and D’s Shouldn’t happen  Beyond six But He is  Past eight His handwriting  Is really bad He writes  Too fast His grip is wrong  His paragraph writing And essays Humorous But way Off the mark In his paragraph On a birthday party He writes His mother is Sleeping and snoring Always trying To be funny I wonder How  He will manage When his marks  Are deducted  For misspelling Incomprehensible  Handwriting  Unfocused Paragraph writing Words missing  In answers What would he do He is assumed  To be normal He has to Compete with  The best He doesn’t have A label Not
Read more